8 reasons why ex-alcoholics make the best husband’s #unigoss

image

According to relationship writer Johnny Schroeder, dating a guy or being married to a man who used to be friends with alcohol could teach you one or two things about
making choices. Schroeder says many sober guys are struggling or depressed, but a large portion
of them are just regular, awesome guys who don’t drink or use drugs. Some are serious,
some are religious, and some aren’t; some are silly, outgoing, athletic, adventurous, and upbeat. But the truth is, guys who are solidly sober and living a healthy life are just as diverse as guys who drink.
Here are the reasons according to Schneiderlin why sober guys make the best partners for women:

1. They’re brave:
Imagine if you’d lived a large part of your life one way, and
then suddenly had to give up the
thing you depended upon most.
Imagine if your long-standing set of
habits had to be thrown out the
window entirely and you had to live a
whole new life. That’s what your sober
crush has done, and that’s brave as
hell. To believe, to hope, that life will
get better if you make super tough
choices and follow through with them
basically makes your sober guy a
superhero.

2. They’re strong:
Maybe you want a guy who’s strong enough to pick you up
and carry you up to the bedroom in a
moment of passion, move heavy
furniture, or open pickle jars for
you. That’s all fine and good, but
when it comes to strength I think the
hottest way someone can be strong is
from within their soul. And what’s
stronger than working your ass off to
grow into the person you want to be?
To find a tiny seed of strength inside
yourself during your darkest
moments, and cultivate it so you can
live a healthier life and be more
responsible? What’s stronger than
looking in the face of your demon
and saying, “No thanks”? Pretty
much nothing.

3. They know how to ask for help: You know that stereotype about guys, where they’d rather drive around for hours than ask for directions? Well, even though we now have Google Maps
to tell us how to get places, guys are
still taught that to be a “real man,”
they need to be solitary, strong, and
never ask for help. Sober guys know
that pretending everything is fine
doesn’t work for them. So, while I
can’t guarantee that your sober guy
will ask for directions when you’re
lost, I’d be willing to bet he’ll ask for
emotional support when he needs it.

4. You won’t be their only outlet for venting:
Because typical masculinity
is stoic and solitary in our society, lots
of guys have trouble with emotionally
intimate friendships with other guys.
This is sad for guys, and can be a
huge burden on their partners. If we,
as women, are the only outlets for
their feelings and frustrations,
sometimes we start to feel like their
emotional waste bins, instead of their
lovers. But many sober guys have
found a network of support where
they can vent and share their
feelings. For many, that outlet is AA
or NA, but other sober guys may have
a therapist, clergy member, or a
group of other like-minded people to
rely upon when times are tough. Think
of it like your guy’s very own
superhero agency. Avengers assemble!

5. They can drive you home from
parties: Let’s be clear here:
your
sober partner probably has as much
interest in hanging out with your
drunk ass as he does poking himself in
the eye with a hot fire iron. But every
once in a while, if you’ve enjoyed a
glass of wine at dinner or a couple of
beers at a barbecue, your sober
partner is someone you’ll be
especially grateful to have around to
drive you safely home. Just never
abuse this privilege. You, and only
you, are responsible for your
drinking. Don’t be a creep who takes
advantage of your sober guy. He’s not
your personal taxi.

6. The person they are at a party is the same guy the next day: We’ve all met
a guy who was fun, flirty, and had a
great sense of humor when he was
buzzed at a bar or party, but the
next day he was a cold, stand-offish
jerk. That, my friends, probably
won’t happen with a sober guy. He’s
doesn’t use booze as a crutch to be
fun at parties, so the guy you meet
at 11pm will be the same guy you
meet for brunch at 11am.

7. They won’t make weekend mornings miserable with their hangover:
I don’t
know about you, but I love to make
the most of my weekends. When I
dated guys who drank a lot, weekend
mornings were spent tip-toeing
around, trying not to wake the
hungover bear. Nowadays, my hunky
sober husband is up early, packing
bikes or surfboards into his truck, and
getting ready for a day of fun and
adventure. This is an especially
attractive trait when you have kids.
Daddy gets up early, makes
breakfast, and is happy to be the
tickle-monster to happy toddlers who
are squealing with joy.

8. They won’t use being drunk as an
excuse for crappy behavior: Your
sober guy understands that there’s no
excuse for being a jerk or making bad
decisions — not even alcohol. So as
long as you’re with him, you’ll
probably never hear him laugh off a
hookup with another woman or a
reckless spending spree with the
excuse, “Honey, I was drunk!” Also,
he’ll know where he parked his car
after a late night out, and will
remember the name of the woman who
wakes up next to. Now, don’t you hope
that’s going to be you?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s