Good morning Blunts
Facts for the day: The average amount of time a woman can keep a secret is 47 hours and 15 minutes.
Jude: Fat lie
BENITA: that’s a lie.
Topic of the day: Do you have to make your relationship public to show you are proud of you partner?
GHOST: So you all are nite crawlers, nite observers, interesting.
GHOST: Nite observers, well done ooo, lemme go and read… That’s the topic of day, a girl requested we should talk on that….
Uleta: Yes and no, It depends on d guy, before u go into any relationship u should atleast know a thing or two about the person u r planning 2 go in2 a relationship with, some people are introverts some are extroverted, some are sanguines others are melancholic. If u are in a relationship with a guy who is introverted n doesn’t always use u as his dp or talk about his love 4 u on his pm it doesn’t mean he don’t love u, but if u r dating a guy who’s extroverted n like all the social media javaganza n he doesn’t post any picture of u or talk about u on his social media handles, my friend pls recieve brain n b wise.
And no matter how introverted a guy is, if he really cares about u he wouldn’t be shy 2 make ur relationship public.
CHRIS: That’s a relative topic for the same sins men are guilty of in a relationship, women are guilty all the same. Some girls don’t use the photos of the guys they date on social media as well. Both girls and guys are guilty of the same. But whether that is an infringement to the whole sanctity of a relationship is unknown to me as only the parties involved can determine that. What I’d do here is to provide likely governing principles for relationships as there are statutes of general applications in life though relationships don’t have any distinct rule per say except for those made by the parties involved. The first thing we need to know about relationships of all kinds is that it must have rules set by the parties involved and nobody else as there are no outside rules to friendship. Friendship is a mutual partnership for which its working parameters is determined by the parties involved. Where there are no rules set by the parties involved, then either of them can’t be seen to do wrong whether one makes a relationship public on social media or not. Whether a guy/lady uses photos of their lovers on social media or not. These are areas determined by the people involved because I’d be stupid to determine what is obtainable in a friendship that has nothing to do with me. The only time where making a relationship public and the displeasure to use photos of a lover on social media is sin is only when the parties involved have made concession on a matter like that by themselves one betrays the other. But as a general idea, I cannot say that its wrong to use photo or not and that its wrong/right to publicise relationship or not. These things aren’t big deals at all but they become a problem when the parties involved agree to A B C D etc and either of them has betrayed that. For example, I once dated a lady who didn’t like the fact that I didn’t use her photo on social media and who would publicise our relationship on the same social platform. Initially, I didn’t like her objection but because she was my lover, we had to come to a concession on the issue personally and when we did, everyone was happy. We agreed to limiting the act of social media publicity of our relationship for many reasons but we didn’t abandon ship entirely. From that day on, each time I failed my own end of the agreement, she’d query me or each time she fails her own end of the agreement, I’d query her. That’s how it works; those things aren’t general rules that you should publicise relationships on social media or not but it becomes a problem or an act of betrayal when the parties involved have set rules to that effect where if such rules mutually set is infringed upon, then its tantamount to betrayal of the relationship. So, Mike tell the lady who requested for this answer that such things aren’t general rules but they’re subject to the parties involved exclusively. Thanks.
Uleta: on point: But Chris speaking on behalf of the ladies, y ask me out or go into a relationship with me if u don’t wanna let the world know about it??? Its a relationship and we go into it with the hope of it leading 2 marriage right???, marriage can not be hidden why hide d relationship if there are no hidden agenders??
CHRIS: Thanks Mr Dan. Okay, for that Mr Dan, you have a point but this is where agreement comes in. When a man and woman come together for a relationship, they must set rules as anything that is without rules will fail in no time. Even if they want to get married or are looking close to the future upon coming together, they must agree on certain things cos people are different but people only connect based on mutual compatibility. I’ve met all kinds of people, ladies and guys with different characters but one thing I always say is that the laws of attraction is always based on something and two people can’t walk except they agree the bible says so whether they want to get married or they want something else, they have to agree on that issue; that’s how it works Dan. The reason a lot of relationships fail is cos the parties involved don’t set rules, limits but just carry one oblivious to what’s at stake. Why is it compulsory to communicate in a relationship? So, one will know what the partner wants and doesn’t. Likes and dislikes. Its just like that. So, I understand all the “if you’re proud of me, you’d let the whole world know thing.” But then, love, pride etc are subject to agreement. A relationship is one thing and love is another thing. Couples only bridge them together to have a balance. That sort of a thing becomes betrayal when the parties who are planning to get married agree to such things and one partner refuses to comply. That would imply that such a partner has something to hide, is insincere etc. But one can’t fault such a partner until that has been mutually agreed.
GHOST: I think we should cut the celebrities some slack, some are afraid of rumors breaking the relationship so keep it low key until marriage, politicians also keep their relationship low key until marriage to avoid kidnapping or false rumors.
CHRIS: Naturally, if you love something, you’d show it. There’d be proof of the desire for that thing hence the fact that people get all publicity about relationship.. But then, people are different for a lot of reasons let’s not forget that but that’s where communication comes in. Love has its language, its feelings, its emotions etc but a relationship is also about agreements, compatibility, partnership etc and these characters of relationships are based on mutual consensus.
Exactly Mike, people do so for diverse reasons we can’t enumerate. But one thing about love is clear. Love has its characteristics and these characteristics have been in operation long before social media came into existence so to discredit love based on social media silence is like implying that the rain is jealous cos you use the umbrella against the sun as well. See, its entirely up to the people involved. Me personally, I don’t like social media publicity of my life at all; let me say that I hate it! But I’m a good lover. So, will I say that I’m a bad lover just because I don’t publicise my girlfriend or love-life on social media? No. That’s my choice personally. But if I date a girl who can persuade me to loosen up a bit on my hatred for social media publicity of my life, then for loves sake, we’d come to an agreement on the issue where everyone will be happy. But I won’t say that I love her less cos I choose to make our relationship silent. Even my personal accounts of things on the blunts isn’t going down well with me but its a risk I’m willing to take in order to drive home my points. I’d be pleased if someone is enlightened based on my personal account of things. My sacrifice, my choice. I once dated one of the most beautiful girls in Nigeria, yet for one day, social media didn’t know about it. It was my choice and she was cool with it. She likewise didn’t publicise cos it was our agreement. That’s how it works.
GHOST: Naturally humans are proud of what they have or have achieved, so if your partner is not proud to show you to the world then it means it is either you are about to be cheated on or you being cheated on. No two ways about it..
A guy who does not show case his babe to the world is just waiting for more opportunities from other babes, let’s face the fact, we are guys & that’s the truth.
Uleta: Like seriously everylady who’s in love with any guy wants the guy 2 shout it out 2 the world, it makes them feel safe, loved and appreciated so chris u r speaking theoretically not practically.
CHRIS: Smiles. Not all guys/ladies are like that Mike. I am not like that though I dislike social media publicity of my life or even general publicity.
Uleta: Does that mean u’ve not uploaded a picture of ur spouse on any social media???
CHRIS: The internet is a market place. Social media is like being on the street, not everyone likes to be called a street boy or girl. I can speak for myself in this regard. I have Mr Dan when I dated a lady who fancied such so I had to adjust to that all in a bid to please her. So, we came to a consensus/agreement.
GHOST: Every babe wants security, is not as if you will over do it but once in a while you have to make her feel secured.
CHRIS: And I ask Mike, weren’t ladies secure before social media was invented? Social media isn’t even up to 30yrs old sef.
Uleta: Chris answer my question.
CHRIS: I understand you and ladies Mike that’s why I did in a past relationship but people are different. I don’t like social media publicity of my life.
Bose: Nyc one bruh.. Same here
GHOST: Yes they were, but we are in a technology age.
CHRIS: Oh, technology babes is it? *laughs*. I have uploaded in the past Mr Dan.
GHOST: Everything upgrades, even relationship do upgrade, 90% of relationships of now is from social media.
Bose: U don’t av to mak ur relationship public before u both realise dat u don’t love each oda , and if a guy does not use ur pix as a dp does not mean he did not love yhu. It just depend of d type of person u are dating … Gud morning here.
Uleta: Ok In as much as u don’t like social media publicity u still cared n loved her as much as uploading her pics. You see, 2 all d ladies if he doesn’t flex u on social media, run 4 ur life, he’s playing games n he’s scared that ur picture might spoil his runs.
Bose: Dats not true cux even me I don’t really lyk using my own personal pix as dp on some social network not to talk of my guy and dat does not mean I don’t love him or he don’t
BENITA: Good morning lol
CHRIS: That’s because of love Mr Dan. But personally, I don’t like such and if I choose not to and she’s okay with me not liking it, it would be wrong for anyone to imply that I don’t love her much cos I’m silent about her on social media. That’s how it works Mr Dan.
Uleta: “That’s because of love🤔noted”.
CHRIS: I’ve seen it all with women. There’s possibly no woman out there that will make me want more if I did have a girl I love by my side so that’s not enough reason to imply that such a person is up to something. I am a one woman kinda guy, I don’t double-date or cheat, only fools do so. I keep my life as private as possible cos that’s wisdom in its own right. Miss Ademi is right.
BENITA: Good morning, Good morning, Good morning, Good morning, Good morning, Hain!
Uleta: Benita we av hear oooo.
Bose: Madam Benita sorry jare, gud morning oooo
BENITA: Ahn ahn na
GHOST: As I’m I hate to use my pixs or particular pix of a particular babe consistently, I prefer to use cartoons but if I have a babe and I feel it would make her secure, why not i would use it for a while… I once had fling with a babe, who always insisted I must use her pix as dp, believe me the I used her pixs for just 6hrs, a guy ping to tell me her curdled the babe not quite long… It happened on 3 different occasions.. So at times using a babe as dp self elp. Morning Benita, no time to greet, just join the convo already.
Uleta: just imagine, My dear therez nothing 3 b scared of or worried about if u have nothing 2 hide shikena.
CHRIS: Everything in life has got consequences.. Even your uploading her photo betrayed her past which should have been protected. Didn’t people survive before social media? Relationships are the same Mike but the methods to meeting people has upgraded not relationships. Smiles.
Bose: And by d way, using pix as dp has its own advantage but I fink it has more disadvantage at least ghost someone bad maot her and I guess u guys broke up ryt.
GHOST: I no dey break up with babe, I do ignore or do my own back and move on.
Bose: I don’t really lyk the idea of dp tho.
CHRIS: That’s why I said its up to the people involved. When did it become a rule that any one relationship must first greet the social media world before its real? Are you dating social media or a person?
Bose: lmao, Lemme just say am not freak abt it.. If he does gud for him , if odawise it is allowed.
Bose: By d way y do u fink celebs don’t make their relationship a public thing only to hear dat dis person is gonna get married in few days ??? Except few I guess
Uleta: We are in the 21st century Chris, back then our parents sent love letters we send SMS, they met are river paths n bushes we meet at cafeterias n go on dates. Everything has changed Chris, As a wise man once said change is d only constant, Ways of showing love have upgraded.
CHRIS: Exactly Miss Ademi, Mike previous girlfriends past ruined his relationship with her which should have been protected. No one is a saint, if she had such a record in the past, does it mean that she should continually pay for it any relationship she gets involved with? See where uploading got her to.. And what if those guys were lying Mike just cos they were jealous. One can’t really vet these things or determine them. Every man/woman has got a chance to better their past and not have someone destroy them for it.
Teejay: Dp usage or the uploading of pix on social media is entirely up to the discretion of those in a relationship. More often than not as Chris said, terms have to be met in a relationship over many issues because of the differences in background, upbringing and exposure. Celebs are humans too, not all of them like unnecessary publicity.
Bose: Fanx bruh
Uleta: Av gat 2 go n bath I’ll b bck 4 this gist
Teejay: Loool….personally, I don’t like to use my own pix. I find myself using my friends pix esp my very good female friends. Michael’s personal experience is just a flip side of things that can happen if you let the world know who you are with. There are also things that can happen if you keep it a secret. Each decision made in that regard has its pros and cons.
CHRIS: See; everyone is different. Even Teejay uses his friends photos. This are matters subject to personal interest and the parties involved. Exactly Teejay. Everything has its consequences good and bad but between two people, they only should decide. Social media publicity was never a law to any relationship. Mr Dan, the 21st century has its methods but love/relationships have got enduring principles. Whether you want to go all technology about your 21st century relationship or not, its a personal road to take; it was never a general law or principle. Its is subject to mutual discretion of the parties involved.
GHOST: There was no 2some in the past, now there is 3some that’s some upgrade, no open relationship in the past, now there is beneficial friend, that some relationship upgrade…. Well like Teejay & Chris have stated, it depends on the individual.
CHRIS: Sure. Always on the individuals. And for the twosome/threesome thing Mike, that’s a sex orgy and not a relationship. And even if 100 people want to be friends, who’s stopping them provided there’s no sex involved for sex being involved makes it an orgy. Its only marriage that involves two people. Any other relationship besides marriage that supports more than two people without sex is friendship but if it supports sex then its an orgy. Smiles. All those terms: friends with benefits, one-night stands etc are just sex. Let’s call sexual relationships when we see it and non-sexual relationships when we see it. Smiles. People and social stereotypes. What’s an open relationship, there’s nothing like that. Its just friendship based on similarities without a consensus from both parties. I speak in practical terms. Yeah, theoretically Mr Dan cos these days women are players just like men. If a woman truly loves a man, she’d defend it across all spectrum and her man will grant her consensus. That’s how it works.
GHOST: Wait oo, if to say one guy and one girl dey date, the guy no like to dey publicize im relationship but the girl like make her bf dey use her pixs as dp, how dem go solve the issue?
CHRIS: Simple. Understanding. Mutual agreement.
GHOST: Wetin you think say the mutual agreement go be?
CHRIS: I once dated a lady who was like that.. All we did was come to an understanding on the issue. I use her dp and she didn’t have a problem using mine. And as expected, it wasn’t until she scared all the other girlfriends on my list that she stopped bothering me. Smiles. Women. But while it lasted, I pleased her cos I loved her. Its not something that I like to do but we came to an agreement on the issue.
Teejay: Michael, Pokémon Go is live in Lagos.
GHOST: Hmmm, chai
CHRIS: Mmm. Pokemon Go is a game of augmented reality that’s anti-christ in nature. (Topic for another day)
Teejay: Chris, smh!
GHOST: Chris!!!!!!!! Hain !!!!
CHRIS: smiles, chuckles
GHOST: No dey take life too serious , life dey too short for over seriousness. But sincerely that game go our girls in a near death disaster.
CHRIS: Mmm. Its because people take life too seriously that they do what they do. See, I don’t want to digress about that but let’s keep it for another day.
NEXT ON #THEBLUNTS EPISODE 10
If you have points to proove or you disagree with any of the above opinions, please share your views with us by commenting below…..