Topic for today
Is your significant other entitled to your social media passwords in a committed relationship?
Or better still.
Should. Couple keep their social media password hidden from each other? And they claim to be committed
Ademi: Since they are call demselves couples , I don’t see any reason y dey should be bidding anything from each other esp password.. It shows dey don’t trust each other. Esp the fact that it is a social media shows y there should be any secrets if and only if they love and trust each other. Gud morning
Michael: It all depends on the agreement between the two individuals but if we were to be truthful to ourselves, love is a force that requires pure honesty, so being furtive shouldn’t be considered and if one has nothing to hide then there should not be a problem of being overt, it might seem Herculean but in truth individuals are just antsy about the way their partner would react to what they see especially if the partner is the jealous type.
Some of us find it rancid if our privacy is being invaded even though they have nothing to hide. So like I stated earlier it depends on the 2parnters but naturally relationship should be without secrets and privacy. Even when you want to establish the act of security on your devices, grant ur partner unlimited access to it, so he would feel safe and not insecure. If a relationship is Clandestine in nature then it would be Ephemeral because both parties would be Meticulous and suspicious of each other which would bring about them being Incisive towards each other over small matters.. The bible said
“for nothing is covered that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known” so why not share your password with your partner and build a mountain of trust in your relationship. I rest my case.
Uleta: well spoken, I see nothing wrong in my partner knowing my passwords 2 my social media handles n vice versa, its a relationship in the first place,there should be nothing to hide,partners are suppose to share everything together, n Michael what’s all that blab about privacy, if u want privacy stay single. What’s there to be private about???,in a relationship. It all balls down to trust,the foundation on which every relationship should be built.
Katie: LOL, abi dan
Jude: So Michael what I saying is that there should b a level of privacy to your spous?
Michael: Jude read my statement again.
Uleta: Relationships and privacy are two different paths that never meet. The more u try to hide ur passwords from ur partner, the more curious u make them, with time they start doubting u,and once doubt steps in,the relationship is on a downslide already.
Michael: thanks for explaining it to Jude.
Jude: If you trust your partner in the first place, why would you be so concerned about their social media password.
Michael: Jude are you sure read my statement well, I explained almost everything that needed to be explained including your last question.
Jude: Maybe wen u get bk to simple English
Jude: I don’t see any reason why you should ask for my social media password, what are you trying to clarify, infidelity? Then you might get more than what you don’t hope to see.
Michael: If there is nothing to hide, you won’t see it as an offense.
Jude: i can’t date a woman and start asking her for password just to clarify what curiosity, that would even diminished the trust I have for you, because you don’t trust, and I won’t give you my password to kill your doubt, that is jealousy and pur selfishness.
Uleta: Mr man be realistic, Are u trying to say that u don’t snoop in on ur galfrnd chat on whatsapp???
Jude: Jude: No, Not because I too trust you, but because I feel I should not.
Michael: Jude is just trying to justify wot is not. If u are in love and u are not cheating, wen she asks for ur fone, u won’t mind
Selena: It all depends on the foundation the relationship was built on
If there was no trust when they were just courting or dating then there would be no trust after marriage.
It isn’t a bad thing to know passwords but most people were brought up having their own privacy she could give him the passwords and still create other accounts he could do the same
But if that becomes an issue then that means getting married was a waste of time cos both of them would be having trust issues and it could cause fights and all that.
Uleta: Some guys even go as far as passwording their gallery,what are u trying 2 hide??
Jude: You are talking like you give your babe your phone without clearing your chat.. You are the one not being realistic here man… You don’t get my point , I would give you my device for sure without wasting time, but what are you looking for, the act of infidelity? You guys are not just being realistic ,
Katie: LOL, Jude any woman who ask for ur done n password at ang given tym n u can’t give den u hiding something.
Michael: Girl love to play with their bf gadgets and stuff not because she is suspecting anything, It is u who has something to hide that would be thinking other wise.
Katie: sure Michael is right.
Jude: Why is she asking, to know if I am cheating on her, or to build more trust?
Katie: Besides jude every woman cares to know.
Jude: Now you brought out a point,
Katie: True relationship were is is love. N if both partners don’t get jealous or wanna no everything abt each other including private life and done n gadget, Den both of then are hiding something.
Selena: From my own point of view oh
If a woman isn’t jealous when she’s dating then she is definitely seeing someone else
Cos Jealousy is one of the ways women shows they love you
Jude: I think every lady think same way, they misinterpret jealous for a proof of love, that another day topic.
CHRIS: Wow. Mm. The Blunts. Such a trajectory. You gotta just love Michael.. I guess he can represent me anywhere in the world. Cool. Everyone has been practical but practicality differs from truth as we trashed out before when I had neuro-sensory downgrade which was psychological at best. With Michael, my signature theme won’t be missed. Smiles.
Jude: Katie, So password is your clue to your secret keeping.. We must date den, and i would always password my phone.
Selena: That’s not misinterpretation now imagine dating a girl and all the time she’s OK with you being with someone else she doesn’t nag she’s doesn’t ask who’s this or who’s that
Some guys would feel it’s cos she trusts him buh no its cos she doesn’t love him prolly sth else made her accept him.
Uleta: Jude if u have no skeleton in ur cupboard u heart won’t pound faster when bae is with ur phone or knows ur password. N even if she checks ur msg u can just laff over it.
Michael: I concur
Uleta: If theres nothing to hide,therez nothing to b scared of.
Jude: No one is talking about being scared, my point is, young lady wat are you trying to proof by checking my device.
Uleta: U want privacy,just remain single cox u getting married alone ain’t private.
Michael: U did not hear that ladies a prone to check their bf phone for credit, games or a simple act of jealousy, Sometimes boredom sef.
Uleta: it’s clear Jude cheats.
Katie: Jude the cheater.
CHRIS: Relationships must have trust whether as animate or inanimate convictions. So issues of privacy, dis transparency, rights are based on the said trust prerogative. A lady/man can only delve into matters of privacy if such is mutually agreed by both parties in a relationship and not that it is a right or principle to be attained. This matters aren’t general applications, rules or laws but strictly subject to the folks involved.
CHRIS: Relationships existed before the advent of social media and these gizmos so how can they suddenly become a point of reference to relationships. This are matters subject to individual rights and not general rights. Which is why all members of the Blunts have had disparaging views here cos their allegiance is mutually exclusive which is what it is. These are very narrowed matters to the people but not general principles of trust and agreement.
Teejay: Michael, I applaud u
CHRIS: So, if your guy/lady should demand such phone transparency, deal with it. But it is not a rule, law, prerogative, fact or judgement. So, everyone is right in their own human practicalities of character but not right as a general principle of relationships. Except that clause is revised by the parties involved in a relationship.
Jude: you made a point.
CHRIS: Even in a martial relationship, there could be levels of privacy which are concurrent with established principles. Every thought, precept, norm or practise on earth has its governing precepts. Nothing is without a rule. Even relationships. Such navigation is individualistic. Which is why we all have our own practise opinions here. But the principles appear as a guide in all these. For me, I care less what my woman does with her fone. Unless otherwise stated. And some ladies I’ve dated to have cared less with what I do with my fone. Cos trust is measured by transparency but decision.
Michael: help us tell Jude.
CHRIS: Transparency are terms of agreement and not a prelude for trust. So, you don’t have to see my fone or I see your fone or we don’t see our fones for me to love, trust you. Cos trust isn’t connected to these things. These things are only areas of agreement and not trust. And if I suspect my woman is cheating on me cos she hardly enquires about my social media landscape, then I must mistrust her. And if that’s an offshoot cos she doesn’t care about me secretly, then we never had a commitment in the first place. Even a married woman will still have admirers who will engage her oblivious to her husband let alone social media rampage is least of it.
Jude: They feel it is a must… Else you are hiding something
Michael: Its not a must, no guy said it’s a must, but we made it clear there nothing bad about it, a relationship must be open.
CHRIS: If one has trust, it won’t matter whether you view or you don’t view fone. Whether some guy/lady approaches your girlfriend or not. It is not a must cos it isn’t a general principle. One isn’t dating social media but a human-being. That’s how it works.
Katie: una naa Sabi, Jude and Chris, mistchew [she hisses]
CHRIS: And these are areas of agreement or terms of modality than statute. That’s my point. The only time when such privacy prerogative is prompted is in the area of communication, agreement etc. Me, I don’t have time to view my woman’s social media space, and she shouldn’t with me but if we decide to be transparent in this regard, then its our own prerogative and not a general prerogative. That’s how it works. Its subject to the people involved.
Jude: You talk like the man you are, perfect analysis and point vaporization.
Michael: Teejay, epp us tell the fainting one [benita] her absense is noticed and her presence would be highly appreciated.
BENITA: My gadgets is not safe because I am single..i wont advice my boyfriend or about to be boyfriend to go through my phone. It’s not an order. You can go through it if you want but whatever you see, how you take it is not my business…people are weird.. when you warn them not to go through your phone’s or whatever they think their ancestors are having a conversation with you about them. Now couples related… it’s an agreement between two of them.. ” babes check who’s calling, babe check my mails for me, any messages? No strings attached why? Because I am married to you no infidelity of course not! But some couples ” pls give me my phone, no you’re not allowed to, I didn’t give you the permission, you do not have the right. Some couples you’d have to write a petition before you can even make a call with their phone. But the relationship is still a hit.
Michael: now you can faint.
Benita: I don’t think it’s a crime, I also feel it’s a crime. I am in the middle agreeing to everyone’s opinion
Jude: Thanks Benita.. That was blurted out… It a personal principle you wish to build your relationship on and it should be respected, and that actually don’t mean your at not faithful or committed, if am not getting you wrong.
Teejay: I am with Benita on this one, However, I would add that knowing your partner/spouse may go along way in determining the direction of your agreement as regards access to each other’s devices. On a personal note, check my phone if you want o. If you get jealous ya on your own. But there is always a story for each thing you see and most of what you will see might seem controversial but is actually harmless.